I'm still here

Thanks to everyone who commented on my posts last week and to those of you who checked in to see how things are going. I'm PUPO with our only embryo. We transferred last Wednesday. It was only Grade 2 (although Dr.Dry thought it might have achieved Grade 1 if given a few more hours to mature. But I'm starting to think he's a closet optimist, despite his demeanor.)

So, we wait. Of course. They told me not to schedule a beta until next Thursday. I might just wait until Friday because Mr.Right has a business dinner on Thursday evening and I'm just not looking forward to being alone after I get the call.

I had really good intentions last week of being a good blogger. I was even going to write a post taking off on an O Magazine article this month about cultivating awe in your life. I was going to be a disciplined writer for once, really putting some effort into my posts instead of just blathering my un-formed feelings. But, I haven't managed to get myself to do it. I'm still skimming all your blogs, but not commenting too much either.

It feels kind of good to just 'be away.' I've not been obsessing about symptoms. Been there, done that. Isn't indicative of anything. Doesn't make a whit of difference.

I've been keeping myself busy with a number of other things, though, which is good. Going on a 1 hour+ walk with the puppy every afternoon (in lieu of running, which, I'm not supposed to be doing). It's been so cold here, but the walks are good. Also getting Christmas presents bought for our 4 nephews and the 5 kids of my cousins whom we'll see on New Year's weekend. Oh, and 4 of those 9 kids have birthdays in December or early January. Lots of gift shopping, but it makes me happy.

I will have to 're-engage' with all of this today, though, as Mr.Right and I have our bi-weekly counseling session this afternoon and I'm going to a RESOLVE IF crossroads support group tonight.

Thanks again to all who have been so supportive through this absolutely hellish last IVF cycle. It was a truly disappointing cycle. But, by next Thursday (or Friday) we'll know what's next. Either way it won't be another IVF cycle for me. And I think I can even see some positive things about that. :-)